The Age of the Digital Fishbowl
Thursday, January 7, 2010 at 10:39AM I was reading this article in the style section (I think it should have been in the technology section personally) of the NY Times yesterday about dating in the digital age. After reading it something my girlfriend posted to me on Facebook about my relationship status caught my attention, "Don't you need to change your relationship status???!!:)".
Well, honestly I didn't think much about it. Some of you may or may not know this about me and the aforementioned status change, I got engaged over Christmas. There I said it now it's public for all the world to see. Which is precisely my hesitation about changing my Facebook status. It's not that I'm embarrassed or shy, for the people who know me I'm hardly either of these things. But I guess I found it impersonal to tell people via the digital universe about something so important and life changing. I really wanted to call those people close to me and tell them the great news with my own voice, this was pretty much family members and a handful of friends. My point is there are some things that I don't feel need to be played out in public, and the whole status of my relationship is one of them. I'm all about technology and the power it wields in the universe we live in, but there are some things better left to be revealed through a more personal touch. Call me old fashioned!
How do you feel about this whole dating in a "Digital Fishbowl" or about the age of the social network? Post your thoughts in the comments below.
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Reader Comments (5)
Congratulations! How refreshing that you are hesitant and a bit old fashioned about sharing such information. The public seems to have an insatiable appetite for other people's private lives. Social networking also creates this false sense of intimacy. People may follow you on Twitter or Facebook but they don't really know you.
Great blog!
I keep my Facebook locked down personally. There are some people in my past that I do not wish to find me. I also do not use my real last name on my Facebook page.I also had a lot of bad things happen late summer 2008 & I didn't want to change my "relationship status" because I didn't want to hear "oh I'm so sorry" or "what did he do to you?" I wasn't ready to tell even my friends I was(am) in the middle of a divorce (ok there you shared & now I've shared) I'm open on Twitter but a lot of my tweets are to people I've become friends with & comfortable with. I've grown a Twitter family. People, such as yourself, I don't flat out refer to as my friend. I say "twitter pal" because you & I don't know a whole lot about each other but we seem to be pretty good Twitter acquaintances. I've found it in my own heart to be polite & give you space with your FB page. I've always wanted to add you but it seems more intimate than Twitter. I love our conversations on Twitter about the blog, fashion, the weather, the K9 crew, and some fun things you tweet. You've been my Twitter pal since spring 2009 & I'm thankful for it. DB is a bit more out there with his FB page & he doesn't seem to mind so much when I'm around, provided I behave myself *giggles*.
I don't think you should have to shout it out to the whole world, just those close to you, it's personal. I remember you having all your Tweets on lock & I'd wonder if you could ever see what I wrote you & sure enough you could! I never once made a fuss that you didn't follow me back. I've always been blessed that when you have a moment you'll return a tweet & it's always wonderful to hear from you.
FB may just be very personal to a lot of people & others want everyone to know everything. Heck I hide a lot of my stuff all throughout FB. I'm surprised no one has gone to my "info" tab & gasped because I'm so unique & different that I'd probably scare some people because they prefer what they know & are comfortable with & nothing outside the norm.
I politely asked DB for a friend request & told him who I was off Twitter & TS. I let him know who I was & he was okay with it. He also didn't mind when I borrowed his wall photos & even all his Star Wars stuff. I have a love for Star Wars, some of his silly photos & I have friends who love Star Wars & I'm sure have seen movies DB has produced. I know I had something Star Wars/MJ that DB didn't have & he borrowed it from me.
Point is everyone is different.(Sorry I took so long to get to the point). A lot on my FB I know personally and I'm friends with & I've reconnected with. DB & the TS boys are my "twitter pals" as I haven't gotten to know them very well. Doesn't mean I don't love them loads.
Hmmm I remember our longest conversation was over Jake & my two girls Kya & Phoenix. DB & I yakked for a long time when it was his birthday & he was showing off everything he got plus he was staying up super late & waiting for you to come home. I also remember him & I talking about stunt fish.
Ms. JA, congrats to you my wonderful twitter pal & fashion ladybug.
Hugs n' love,
Anne
Well said, well read and Congratulations. It must have taken me a good year or more to put my relationship status on fb for all to see. Mind you before I was married I didn't change my status.. in fact I didn't have the relationship status included on my fb page. Anyway, it's on there now: married to DH. It's a funny old Digital word we live in.
All the best & once again congratulations. Sal
Just saw this thanks to Sal! CONGRATULATIONS, to you and Dana!!! That is such awesome news, Johanna! As I've said before, you guys make such a cute couple as I've enjoyed your short videos and twitpics. Congrats!!! :)
That's Wonderful News!!!!! Congrats to you and Dana! And you're right, those close to you should hear it from you personally, then the rest of us later. I"m sooo excited for you. USTREAM wedding?